My Special Talent

People often think that my talent is creating art, but that’s only because they don’t know about my REAL talent: the ability to fail at everyday life in the most unimaginable ways.

For example, some recent misadventures:

  • I accidentally washed an entire roll of toilet paper into my laundry. There was wet paper pulp stuck on EVERYTHING. 
  • I set my roommate’s toaster oven on fire because I thought it would be a good idea to melt the butter while you toast.
  • I flooded my bedroom carpet with 5+ gallons of fish tank water because I forgot to put the filter back into the right position after unclogging it.

Some classical examples:

  • I thought it would help make mashed potatoes faster if I put the potatoes into a blender before cooking it. The final cooked potatoes became elastic goo. Video evidence seen here. 
  • Frying tapioca is not a good idea. 
  • Neither is putting cheesecake in soup. (I wanted to give it a creamy flavor)
  • Then there was that one time when mushrooms grew from the carpet…

I rest my case.

This post is posted on Saturday 13 April 2013.
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Tagged as: I fail at life
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